


Metronome

by Atomicwigglz



Category: Pocket Monsters | Pokemon - All Media Types, 僕のヒーローアカデミア | Boku no Hero Academia | My Hero Academia
Genre: Aizawa Shouta is not ready, All the quirks, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, BAMF Midoriya Izuku, Bakugou Katsuki Swears A Lot, Band of bakubros, Gen, Good Parent Midoriya Hisashi, Maybe - Freeform, Metronome becomes a quirk, Midoriya Izuku Does Not Have One for All Quirk, Midoriya Izuku Has a Quirk, Midoriya Izuku is a Little Shit, Other, Todoroki Enji | Endeavor's Bad Parenting, mineta has been evicted, no betas we die like men, so does Izuku
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-02
Updated: 2020-09-02
Packaged: 2021-03-06 19:15:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 13,138
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26254000
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Atomicwigglz/pseuds/Atomicwigglz
Summary: The user waggles a finger and stimulates its brain into randomly using nearly any move. Alternatively, "How Deku stopped worrying and learned to love Lady Luck."
Relationships: TBD - Relationship
Comments: 5
Kudos: 74





	1. Chapter 1

Title: Metronome  
Originally by Old_Herobrine  
  
Summary:

The user waggles a finger and stimulates its brain into randomly using nearly any move. Alternatively, "How Deku stopped worrying and learned to love Lady Luck."

  
  
Published at: 2019-05-01  
Revised at: 2019-05-13 21:54:08 -0400  
Necromancy'd back to life at: 2020-08-02  
  
Chapter 1

**Chapter One: You cannot Sleep now. There are monsters nearby**

* * *

Everybody say "HEEEYYYY!"

 _Silence_.

"Oh, come on now! Where's your spirit! Everybody say 'HEEEEEYYYY!"

_Tension._

"Oh, fine. Have it your way. Regardless, welcome to the physical portion of the UA entrance exam!"

If I had to be frank, I should have been more jazzed that we were being introduced to Present Mic. Number 32 in the Hero Top 50 magazine. Head of the Present Company Radio show which also doubled as his personal hero agency. Hizashi Yamada is a stellar example of someone who seamlessly balances being a hero and a celebrity. Has good taste in R&B.

Problem is, I'm trying to catch a nap and he is shouting. Neither is helping. Cracking my eyes open, I can see him describing the robot pointer system. Different levels of points per robot you take out. Different difficulties per point level. Ten minute time limit.

Fascinating. I knew UA was well-funded. Isn't this a bit much though?

Doesn't matter anyway. I take the information in stride and try to sleep again. If I miss anything important, he'll let me know when I wake up.

Speaking of which.

"Oi. Deku." I rock sideways in my seat as Bakugo nudges me with his elbow. He's going to keep doing that until either I fall off my chair or I respond. It's such a drag, but I'd rather not cause a scene. That would just lead to him hogging the spotlight, pulling me in with him, and then everyone is in for a bad time.

"Hrungghg." I glare at him out of the corner of my eye. "I'm a bit preoccupied at the moment, Katsuki. Make it quick."

"What?" He glares back at me, sneering. "Got a fluke, loser? Trying to reset?"

"No, I'm trying to compose the anthem of a generation in my head - _what does it look like?_ " He knows exactly what I'm doing.

"Oooh, snappy. Remind me to buy advance copies when you release it post-mortem after I'm done burying you."

"Riveting, Kaachan. I bet your mother would still love me more than you. I can get more value if I'm dead."

"Fuck you Deku."

"Necrophilia is illegal, Kaachan. Even if you can warm up my corpse with your-"

"Excuse me!"

The lungs on this lad. I turn, eyeing someone a few rows down. Slick, blue hair, broad shoulders, glasses, and a face that only Kaachan could love. I uncross my arms and lean my head forward.

"Hey, Kaachan, he's talking to you."

"Shit, Deku, what are you looking at? He's talking to himself, poor thing."

"I am talking to the both of you! Your muttering is very distracting!"

Really? Our muttering? I'd be more interested about the content of our muttering than the noise. Also, is he deaf or just selective? How can he hear us over Present Mic? Is his quirk super hearing?

"...You're right. My bad Kaachan. Wake me up later."

"Fuck no. Set an alarm. I'm not your butler."

"...You're right again. I don't pay you well enough for that."

"Will the both of you please quiet down? You are disrupting this assembly!"

Assembly? Hunh. Ass-embly? Mmm.. do I go for it? I could. I can feel Kacchan about to explode right next to me.

I close my eyes and let out a loud snore. It shuts both of them up. Kaachan is probably torn between addressing the extra or kicking me off my chair. If he is a wise child, he'll pick option three.

The world tilts sideways. Suddenly off-balance, I fall off the chair.

Okay, that's it.

Nah, it's more fun to wait. It gets him antsy. I lock eyes with the bastard, grin, and put both my hands behind my head. Maybe I'll nap better on the ground.

He ignores me then. He knows it's too much work. Once again, I feel a faint stirring of pride in my chest. I've trained him so well.

* * *

I'm in group B. Or was it A? I don't remember. I'm in a group of people getting ready for the practical exam. Some are stretching, some are trying not to panic, some are panicking. Me, I'm trying to get some more sleep. I tried to nap on the briefing floor, but no such luck.

Perfect. I should have just gone without sleep last night, but yesterday's roll of the dice wasn't going to cut it today.

Subtly, I run my fingers across the concrete. I can feel my quirk activating, which confirms it's touch-based like this morning. I can feel some of the rubble shifting, but for the life of me I can't figure out what it's doing. Is it reactive based? Is it electromagnetic? Is there something in the ground?

"Excuse me!"

The lungs on this lad. A shadow looms over me, and I'm looking up into Mr. Super hearing.

"What are you doing here?" He's shouting. I can hear him just fine. Is he drawing a scene? I glance around, making sure he's not talking to an invisible person. I take my time at it. When I look back at him, he's still staring at me.

He's making a scene. Joy.

"...What are _you_ doing here?" I fold my arms behind my head. If he could kindly move a bit to the left, he'd block out the sun.

"I asked you first!" He's glaring down at me. He also has pipes sticking out of his legs. I notice this because the sun is reflecting off of the metal and onto my face. How? Did he polish them? Are they chrome?

"And I asked you second. Ha." I close my eyes again.

"How does that matter? The person asking the question first is in the right, and should be answered as such!" He's getting louder?

"Yes, but if you think about it, from a non-linear, non-holistic point of view, my question is an answer in of itself." I lift my hand slowly, as if about to start a speech. "For you see, the best way man learns is to answer a question, with a question."

"You haven't answered anything! Are you deliberately being belligerent?! Your antics in the interview were very distracting to the other examinees." His foot is starting to tap against the ground. I can feel it through my head.

I click my teeth and point finger guns up at him. "No. You." Bam. He's done for.

I figure he's about to say something else. He is saying something else. I let him drone on. Something something, Somei. Something something ' _grr my pride'_.

It's cute. Really. I wish I had a mirror on me.

"Look. Iida." He stops shouting at me. I think I surprised him cause I heard his name in his monologuing. I grunt as I sit up, noticing that everyone is now looking at us. Lovely. "As much as I would love to chat about whatever crawled up your exhaust pipes, I am trying to prepare for the exam. Now, if you would kindly eat dirt and leave, that would be greeaaat." I smile up at him and pat his shoe.

 _*Fzzzt*_ A small zip of static jumps from where I touch his shoe. At the same time, I notice that Iida is suddenly on the ground, his face on the pavement and ass in the air.

Wait… hold on.

"UNACCEPTABLE!" Iida hops right back up, his glasses askew. "Using one's quirk against another examinee. I knew it! You are trying to sabotage the exam!"

...What? ...Roll with it.

"Yeup." I pop my lips and start getting to my feet. Is that a crowd gathering? Really, now. "You got me. I'm not actually an examinee, I'm a plant throwing you off." I'm now staring up at Iida. "And of all of the examinees here, I am not impressed at your theatrics."

Ooo, I hit a nerve. Just a little further.

"Look at yourself." I shrug and plaster a shit-eating grin on my face. "Distracting so many other examinees with your generous lungs and your yelling. Look at this crowd gathered around us." He does. It's nice to see his murderous expression now turn to horror. Yes, keep going. I need to sell this so I can figure out what he meant by-

" _AAAANND, START!"_

Screw it. In a second, I lash out with my hand and catch him in the chest. The tingly feeling goes down my arm as I see Iida's face bloom with confusion. I turn and bolt towards the open entrance. As I'm starting to run, I see him hit the ground again, head first.

Well, this is a very specific quirk. Is it balance based? Will it work on robots?

Excellent question brain. It looks like it's time for some very unscientific testing. And by testing, I mean first running away from Iida before he thinks he might get extra points for taking out the "mole".

" _It looks like someone got the message! What are you waiting for? There's no countdown in life! Go, go, go - get on out there and show the judges some PLUS ULTRA BABYYYY!_ "

* * *

Well, it does work on robots.

The first group I come across is a bunch of one pointers standing in an alley. I bolt for them. I vaguely hear one of them starting to say something in a robot voice. Too late, Johnny 5.

I reach out with my hand as I call on the feeling. My hand hits, and the same jolt goes through my arm. It's a lot stronger this time. I stumble a bit. I watch as the robot suddenly lurches backwards, its single wheel looking like someone just swept it from behind. Crashing to the ground, I seize the moment and bring my other hand forward.

There's another _*FZZT*_ as the hammer in my other hand goes through its eye. It's a hell of a mock-city when the general stores are also somehow fully stocked. That's very confusing, but I'm not picky. The other robots start to react. The one on the left lunges forward, reaching out for me. I reach out and smack the limb with the back of my hand.

Another * _Zap*_. So it's not just my palms. As it too slips, I leap off the remains of the first robot and grab the shield of the other robot. Zap! Both of them are down. I cave in the eye of the one closest to me. By the time the other one starts to get back up, I'm on top of that one.

Another eye gone. An eye for an eye, my mechanical muse. There's three points right there.

I take a short breather. Present Mic shouts eight minutes on the clock. I have a grand total of three points. I thought there was more time than that. Hunh.

There's no time to make up a name for my quirk. I'll think of it later. Another group of robots. Two pointers this time. For some reason, they're not using their guns. I know the one pointers had them, but they aren't firing. I leap after them, brandishing my hammer like the hero Black'n'Decker and make for the closest robot. It swings its arm at me. Doesn't matter. I grab onto its shield and I ride it down as it slips up. Even three-legs can't stop my hack-ass of a quirk!

Lady Luck, I love you. I'd ask you to marry me if I wasn't strapped for cash.

I reach twenty points before I miss a swing. I get a solid hit against my side for my trouble and get thrown against a car. Ouch. I broke the glass. It still went down. Not sure how that happened, cause it's a three-pointer on treads. It's like it slipped on a banana peel. Now it's stuck.

I hobble over and start going to town on its head when I hear the worst noise I have ever heard in my life. Its like screeching metal and the righteous anger of a hundred nails on glass. Much worse that three toddlers who missed their nap on Thursday afternoons. I drop my hammer and cover my ears.

A shadow starts to cover the street. I look back behind me. And up. And up, until I'm looking at discount mecha-godzilla towering over the city block. It's scraping its metal hands against the offices on either side of the street. Its fingers are grinding against the glass. I feel sorry for whoever has a super hearing quirk. They must be having a bad day.

Well… I hope this one is worth more than ten points. Doesn't matter. At least I might get credit for trying?

I leave my hammer as I dive into the nearest shop. My right arm hurts like Bakugo used it for kicking practice. Hey, he did once. It hurt back then too. I quickly scan the shelves, grab the first long thing I can find, and run out.

Mecha-Godzilla is about as tall as a twenty-story hero office. No guns on this one either. I look down as its slowly moving forward on treads that are basically mulching the cars. It's smaller than I thought. The upper frame seems to fit through the street.

Actually…

The more I look at it, the less of a herculean effort this might be. It's not absolutely destroying everything around it. Yeah, there are examinees running away from it. Yeah, I think there are some who fell down. But it isn't as if it's trying to crush them under rubble. Come to think about it-

I duck back into an alley. Ripping off my my jacket, I wrap it around my head. I wish I also grabbed some eye protection in the store, but all I needed was this. As soon as I see the front of the treads, I dart out the side alley. It's bigger up close, but it doesn't have cameras around its middle.

In a few seconds, I'm behind the robot. Taking a deep breath, I hold it in and jam the My Little Pony umbrella in-between the black, rubber treads. As it moves forward, I hold onto dear life and ride the rear treads as they carry me into the air onto the back of its chassis. Letting go, I scrabble onto the metal and crouch low. It's not fast, but you try standing on top of a tank in motion.

My arms are tingling, but the robot isn't going down. Figures. It's too big. Behind me, I hear the umbrella wedge itself under the treads and probably snap. Crawling onto the robot, I look up at the modular backbone. I'm about to start climbing when another ear-splitting shriek hits me from above. I cover my head and get close to the body as glass, debris, and stone start raining down.

A piece of rubble crashes next to me and I feel a year slip off my life. Without hesitation, I grab a piece of rebar before it falls off the tank and start climbing up the leg. Or I would have, if I wasn't a moron. You try standing on a tank, you try climbing up a rock wall during an earthquake.

Well, shit. I'm on the back of a moving tank I can't climb, but I'm fresh outta ideas. My right shoulder is starting to numb - that bodes poorly - and this thing keeps racking up the insurance policy on everything within arm's reach.

I slap it with my hand again. This time, I pay attention to its upper torso. The treads don't stop rolling, but at the same time I feel the jolt, I think I see the torso move back. That's something. Holding onto the leg, I drive the rebar under an overlapping metal plate and start jolting it in spurts.

As the robot takes another swing at a building, I grit my teeth and slap it so hard I can feel the bolt in my chest. For a moment, I think I feel the leg leave the ground. Or maybe it's the adrenaline wearing off. Shit, that's worse.

"Excuse me!"

 _Son of my father_ \- I look back and see Iida fucking Tenya leap up beside me, jets shooting the back of his chrome job. He lands on the tank wrong and starts to flail backwards. I reach out with my numb arm and grab a hold of his hand.

Hot damn, that hurts. I vaguely notice the dark red on my sleeve as I haul Iida from the edge and into the leg. Grabbing it, he starts shouting - this time appropriately as the robot is still moving.

"I saw you run down the side and mount the back of the robot! Ingenious! Do you need assistance, examiner?! Your arm is bleeding!"

"Yes, fuck, and yes!" I shout. "The damn thing malfunctioned and it's gone rogue. I have no idea how to stop it - I don't get paid enough to know this shit! Any ideas?" I notice that the robot is starting to slow down. I wonder if it's making a turn? Still hanging on for dear life, I see a ton of debris in front of the robot. It's reaching down to pick some of them up.

"Iida! Can you race up the side of a building and reach its head?" He could smash it himself, or at least find a way to short the system. At the same time, he could get caught in the neck of the robot and get squished as the robot turns its head.

My mind races through ideas as I'm listening for Iida to pipe up. Jam the treads? Rebar won't work. Can Iida run up walls? He could hit the eye. Could he kick it hard enough to move it a bit? I could try and knock the sucker over, but it might just get back up again.

"I am sorry! I cannot do that." I hear Iida shout back. Well, at least I can hear him now. That's that idea out. I wiggle the rebar under the plate. Not budging. Kami, is this military grade? Training for the quirkless mechanical revolution? Is this from the support hero course?

Wait… Hold on. I look back at Iida. We're no longer vibrating. I could hear him over the noise. I look down at my feet. The tank isn't moving. I look back at Iida. He's looking up. His arms are frozen and his bottom jaw just hit the ground.

Ooh, I don't like the implications of that.

I launch myself at Iida, just as I notice the big shadow over the both of us. As I tackle him, I can hear the screech of metal fingers against the buildings. Before we hit the pavement, I shock him with my quirk. For a moment, I feel weightless without a sense of down. Then Iida's feet slam against the pavement and I nearly pull him over. My knees hit the concrete and I feel something slip. Glass starts to rain down all around us as I half run, half drag him through an alley.

Shit's fucked. At some point, Iida ends up grabbing me himself and I cling onto dear life like a baby carrier as he hightails it out of the alley. Emerging into the other street, I let go and hit the pavement like a sack of bricks. My knees are skinned, one of them feels off. The slow burn in my right shoulder is starting to pinch like a runner's cramp and I'm totally out of breath.

I take a peek at Iida. His glasses did not survive. If he feels half as winded as I do, then he's pretty much spent. There have to be only a few minutes left. If I'd known the physical exam was going to be something like this, I'd have brought water. I'd have brought a helmet. Heck, I'd have brought-

No, I can't think about that right now. The big lumbering robot is obviously not worth it. I need to split and find more points.

"Well, that could have gone better." I brush off the debris and test my legs. Ow. I don't think kneecaps are supposed to be like that. "...That could have gone alot better."

"You are hurt!" Iida is fussing over my knee.

"Yeah, probably." I gingerly take a seat on the sidewalk. "I think that about does it for today."

"What do you mean today?! The zero-pointer is still there! Do we need to call the moderators?" He's chopping the air half-heartedly and I can see a bit of battle fever in his eyes. I probably have it too. Or had, more likely.

"No, bud - I think we can give it a rest. Good effort. Ooh rah, and all that jazz." I lean against a nearby light pole and start to close my eyes.

 _Wait_.

"...Iida, can you repeat what you just said?"

"I was saying-

" **FINIIISHED!** " Present Mic drones out the rest of Iida's words. I'm not paying attention to the pro hero.

"-Sorry, can you repeat that one more time?" I gesture to Iida as he flops down next to me.

"I was asking if we needed to call the exam moderators about the malfunctioning zero-pointer. But the exam is over, so I guess your job is done."

... _zero…. What?_

"...Iida, how many points was that robot worth?"

He looks at me oddly. I do not like it.

"Zero. It was in the briefing. Were you really not paying attention?"

"...Well, if you excuse me, I have a bastard I need to kill. Excuse me." I give up, and close my eyes.

* * *

"Bwrahaharahah! I can't believe you idiot - You actually went for it!" Bakugo is laughing his ass off on the train. It's scaring some of the other passengers. I tolerate it 'cause it means that we have the entire row of seats to ourselves.

"Yeah yeah, I didn't pay attention and I got my ass handed to me. If you keep laughing yours off, I'll gladly take yours as a replacement."

"Bitch you can't handle this much ass."

"I disagree." He chuckles and stands up. Nudging me with his foot (read: kicking my shin), I trudge after him. "I've put up with your ass longer than most - I know what it's about. No homo."

He's still chortling as we get off in Chandryla Station. It's west of Musutafu, but not unbearably so. 'Bout a half an hour train ride. If it was any farther, I'd have just as well picked another high school.

But Bakugo….

"Yo, space marine. Back to earth." He's poking my cheek, and I come to.

"Sorry. Was visiting Uranus." _Ha._ "What was your question?"

"I was asking how many points you got." He's no longer smiling.

"Around 20...ish." I reply. He's now frowning.

"Deku, that's nowhere near enough to get in." He gets in my face. "Don't tell me you flubbed it on purpose."

"No I did try, Bakugo." I match his stare. His breath smells like caramel. That's nothing new, but I can see his hands smoking. That's rare nowadays. I shrug and wiggle my hands.

"What did you get?"

"Something with balance, I think. Touch-based. Temporary. I reset before Recovery Girl got to me." We're at the intersection. "I've got an ole' reliable now. I wish I had it back in the exam."

"You didn't fail that, did you?" He's not growling anymore, so there's that.

"Swear on my mum." I say back. "I dislocated my kneecap and my shoulder in the process, so I bet she didn't really like that."

I watch as emotions dance across my childhood friend's face. It's fascinating to watch. Creepy to stare, but if you're familiar with how the process works then you can predict the end result.

I can't predict it this time. He's staring down at the ground.

"Sorry about this morning."

Okay, _that_ is weird.

"Bakugo. I tried. It's not your fault." I move to put my hand on his shoulder, but he slaps it away.

"You fucking try every day. This is a sick joke." Ah, he's back to normal now.

"Dude, I know right?"

Neither of us laugh. We both stare at an ant that's found dinner and is carting off a rice grain. It climbs over Bakugo's shoe. He doesn't kill it for once. We watch it start to climb a brick wall.

"...Shit, … Fuck, I don't-"

"Then don't." I hold Bakugo's eyes with mine. "If you can't, don't. If I make it, sweet. If I don't, well I've already applied. You know what my options are."

"Damn straight. You took your bloody time." I feel a smidgen of levity at that.

I put my fist on his shoulder. "You sleep well, bitch."

"Like a baby." He shoulders me as he passes, but I get the message.

Turning down Marabond Street, I make my way towards my house. It's like every other house on the whitewashed street, with two stories and a garden behind. It's better than most of my neighbors deserve, really, but the streets are crime free and clean.

I fiddle with the keys to get in and I pause for a second. The charm on the doorpost is turned around. Stuck at work again. Well, it was really too much to hope for, wasn't it? I can't complain, but it still sucks.

I open the door to 34 Marabond St., Chandryla, Japan.

….Wait, is that?

There's another pair of shoes. There's keys in the bowl and Link didn't come to trip me up. I step on my heels and sniff the air as my shoes come off. Is that banana bread?

"Hello? The spawnling is back."

"And how did the spawnling fare today?"

"...Swimmingly?"

That is banana bread. That's odd, it's usually burnt. I put my shoes next to the door and walk in. Yeaup, that's banana bread. And yakisoba. And the spicy curry. It's dinner, and-

He's home. Oh. I didn't expect that. He's leaning next to the stove with an apron on that says "Apron". Link is curling around his feet, purring, which means he's been fed.

"Welcome home, Izuku."

I can't help it. I smile.

"Thanks, Dad."

* * *


	2. Chapter Two: You Don't have a POKEMON

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Does a slice of life taste different if it's a banana split?

**Chapter Two: You Don't have a POKEMON**

* * *

" _Perhaps you should give it some time."_

_The doctor smiled, trying to reassure the nervous father. "According to the tests, your son has all of the prerequisites for a quirk. Aside from his missing toe joint, we performed the QF gene test, as well as the customary MEG brain scan. Your son has the customary QF gene code that we find in those with a quirk. I would give it more time for something to show."_

_Both adults smiled._

" _So, I can still get a quirk?" The father looked down at his son, his eyes glistening. The kid was clutching an All Might toy in his hands and fidgeting on the seat._

" _That's what the good doctor says." He ruffled his son's hair, chuckling as his son began groaning in embarrassment "We just need more time."_

The child opened his eyes. He took a deep breath and immediately smelled cat ass.

* * *

"Mmrphf. Gerroff me."

I grumble as Link moves off my face, his bushy tail swishing back and forth as he pitter-patters off my bed. I send a quick thanks to the heavens. Link has done his duty. I just wish he learned how to clean himself better. I'm glad he didn't do it yesterday, elsewise Katsuki would have been even more insufferable.

It's been a week since the practical. The longer I go without any response from UA, the more hair loss Katsuki is gonna have. I can handle normal Katsuki. I can even deal with overly emotional Katsuki.

No one can deal with stressed-out-of-his-mind Katsuki except his dear mother, bless her.

I open my eyes. Sunlight is on the second series Edgeshot vinyl on my wall. It's the one where he was just debuting and did a traditional number with Merchant and Viastrad, the twin samurai sisters. It sold out almost immediately on account of that being the last album the sisters made for awhile, but it certainly got Edgeshot into the spotlight. He never sang again, which is a shame.

The sun is on Viastrad's face as she's looking towards the blossom tree on the cover. That means it's almost nine in the morning. Dad must have let me sleep a bit before he sent Link in.

Time for the ritual.

Slowly, I flex my fingers. One, two, three, four, five. Five, four, three, two, one. Yup. All present. No abnormalities detected. After I do the same with my toes, I slowly sit up in bed.

Nothing on my arms. I gingerly lift the covers off and look down. Nothing odd about my chest or my legs. I don't feel fatigued as I normally do. Recovery Girl is awesome. Not an autograph person - I'm not too bothered by it. She was surprised when I woke up with no injuries. That's **[Rest]** for ya'.

With the care of an elderly man with the rickets, I make my way over towards the full body mirror in the corner next to my gaming rig. I pick up my pen and tablet where I left it yesterday, and I begin peering at my frame.

I flatten my hair. It feels normal. No emitter quirk in my hair. I open TwoNote and jot that down. I press my back to the mirror. Putting my finger on the back, I step away. I'm about as tall as the Gang Orca sticker. That means I'm still roughly 166 cm. I rarely get a height change with my quirk, but I can't be too careful. What if I suddenly start shrinking? I jot that down.

I peer at my muscles. No overt changes, besides the _stunning calf muscles_ and my lean build. Hey, I worked a lot to get as fast as I am. I can outrun Bakugo if I manage to deactivate his quirk on a good day. I jot down "no overt mutant traits". I put the pad down and reach for the ceiling. I don't feel anything odd about my back. One time I woke up with two shoulder blades and boy, did that feel funny.

I perform sun salutations, followed by a stretching routine focused on my legs first, then my arms. I run my hands over most of my body and I pick my nose. Nothing odd about the hairs. One time I accidentally sneezed and melted my breakfast plate. This is why I eat off of plastic plates unless I can figure my quirk beforehand.

I figured out early on that if ever I get a **poison** type quirk that has acid secretions, my hairs feel different around the new exit pores. I check my butt. No tail. I run my hand down my lower back. No tactile differences in the sacrum and coccyx, so nothing about speed. I jot that down and recheck my morning list. So far, no mutation quirk.

I take a deep breath and search for that funny feeling. I rumble deep in my throat and hum _Chop Suey_. Aha. There. A slight tickling in my throat along with a tingling sensation behind the eyes. It's a vocal quirk. I pull up my tablet and bring up my list of possible vocal quirks. I hope it's not **[Hyper Voice]** or **[Screech]**. I sing the first few bars of _K/DA_. No change in overall volume.

I move over to my Endeavor lamp and rummage for my phone. Dad hasn't texted yet, so he hasn't left. That's a late start for him, unless he didn't need to come in. I throw on a pair of black cotton sweatpants and my customary workout shirt before I head downstairs.

The smell of Belgian waffles with a hint of cinnamon hits my nose. Oh shoot, I forgot the sensory check. I quickly feel out my quirk again. The feeling is stronger in my throat than in my eyes. Maybe it's linked. I check TwoNote again for possible past links. I come across a few. There are five pings from last year, one in 2139, and twelve in 2142. I rub my throat.

"He lives! Look, Link, the great Deku tree lives!" Oh, he is feisty today. I smile and make a pinching motion around my throat. Dad looks at me oddly for a second, until I stay silent. Then he gets it.

 _Quirk?_ he signs.

 _Yes. Quirk test?_ I sign back. Link found his sunbathing spot on the windowsill.

Nodding his head, my dad walks back with me. We make our way out on the balcony above the front gate. It's partly cloudy with a chance of meatballs tonight, if Bakugo gets his act together and stops feeling sorry for himself. I'm not eating supper if he's going to go glum at me over the table.

"Hey, dad. Is that supper option with Katsuki still open tonight?"

"Hmm? Is that tonight?"

"Yeah." I feel a lurch at the base of my skull. I narrow my eyes. Voice-based receptive. I jot that down on my pad.

Dad reaches in his pocket and pulls out a cigarette. He blows on it, lights the end, and then blows the end out.

I feel another lurch.

"Can you blow on it again?"

Dad blows on the end. Nothing happens. _Aha. Gotcha._

"It's an old one. I think you named it **[Torment]** three years ago."

"Ohhh." Dad nods like he remembers it. I know he doesn't, but he's being polite.

"So, about supper?"

"Are you asking if you can go, or if I'm open to coming?"

"It's just me, but I don't think Mrs. Bakugo would mind if you could come." Well, here goes.

"I'd love to." Dad is grimacing. "Wish the agency did too."

_And there it goes._

"Hey." Dad looks over at me. "I really enjoyed last night. Don't sweat it. We have the weekend you can come over."

His smile doesn't quite reach his eyes. Maybe I should rescind that weekend thing.

* * *

"Morning Mr. Naknamura!"

I holler as I jog past his house. He's always on the porch around 10am waiting for the mail. It's odd. We're in the 22nd century and he's waiting for the newspaper. I mean, I probably would enjoy it considering his background, but that's just bizarre.

 **[Torment]** is an odd one. Nullifies quirk usage to anyone that responds to my voice, but only after the second time they use it. Took me forever to figure it out. Only worked when I tested it during an open-quirk recess in lower middle school. I made a big fool out of myself - Katsuki helped - then watched as the rest of the kids' quirks stopped working a few minutes in. No one could figure it out. It was all fun and games until the kid with wings dove off the top of the gym and couldn't fly.

He brushes up the story nowadays to where he "fought a high crime thug" and that's how his nose got busted. It impresses the girls some of the time. If he didn't get cold feet during confessions, I'd have let him lie away. Problem is, a few adults started to believe it in my class this year so I had to shut that down real quick.

My usual workout routine is just a short jog around the subdivision. Normally I don't run over 2k, but some days I can get away with running more. Mr. Naknamura's house is around the halfway point. The sun is almost to his front step, which means it's around 11am now.

I wave to the Spasskys' kid who's playing on the porch. He got a telekinetic quirk a year ago and he's driving his siblings up the walls. No, literally. It's incredibly strong. He waves back with that big grin of his as he shuffles cards with his quirk. Normally that would be frowned upon, but this is Chandryla.

Speaking of, this quaint little province is… shall we say different than Musutafu?

Where Musutafu is a sprawling metropolis, Chandryla is a great deal smaller. It's nestled between Musutafu to the east and Hosu to the north. In all honesty, it's more of a retirement hamlet than a province. There's a large population of retired professional heroes which manages to deter crime. The biggest thing around here is the Chandryla Assisted Residential Living. That's about enough excitement right there.

See - when the first generation of quirk users started to age well into their seventies and their mental faculties started to fail, it really affected how they used their quirk. Some of the most powerful vigilantes turned pro heroes who survived until then had massive social problems accrued over decades of work. Coupled with multiple concussions and/or major work stressors, it led to a sudden health issue. You can't exactly imprison former heroes who can't control when their elemental quirk freezes the block. You can't exactly stop a speedster who's got seizures.

Medicine has come a long way, but prejudice hasn't. Think the quirkless have it bad? It's worse for former heroes. Most of the legacy hero families can afford to take care of their grandparents. It's the other ones who either don't have a family or overworked themselves and pushed theirs away.

So yeah, that's the big thing in Chandryla. Government assisted living. Because of it, outside quirk usage is actually more lax because sometimes it's necessary. It's sad, but that's life.

I used to live in Musutafu until dad's job moved. We've been in this new house for two years. It wasn't as far away as I first thought, so _unfortunately_ , I couldn't change high schools. I just had to wake up earlier to get to Aldera.

I wouldn't have minded a switch. But we don't get what we want all the time, do we?

I finish my run downtown at KaShiek's Pastries and Pies. They are the shit. I wave over my shoulder as I grab Katsuki's normal and something for Dad. He's long gone by now to the hero agency, so I have the house to myself. It's a five-minute tram ride from downtown back into a subway stop. From there, I cool off with a 1k back into the subdivision and back home. Link is still on the windowsill. We also have mail.

Biting into a meat pie, I sift through the stuff that's for dad and stuff that Katsuki can use for target practice later. You'd think that we'd have taken care of junk mail in this day and age but nooo.

One of the letters has the UA symbol on it. Oh boy, here we go.

I sort the letters, put the ones for dad near his place, and make my way into the living room. There's a big couch, two Fatgum bean bags, a 45" 12K TV that dad got in a raffle sometime ago, and a cheap card table. I may or may not have had my acid accident with the plate in the living room. Several times.

I throw my feet on the table and crack open the letter. I could wait for dad to come home, but there's no guarantee that he won't be back later than my bedtime. The letter is a bit heavy. There's a small disk that's probably a projector. Can I hack it? What happened to just normal letters?

Oh, it's just going to turn on. I hope it's not too-

"I AM HERE AS A PROJECTION!"

-loud… Wait is that… That's All Might.

Hunh. Long time no see.

"Greetings once again, young Midoriya! It has been a while since we last met. I hope you are faring well!"

I could be better, but I honestly can't complain. Thanks All Might.

"I wanted to greet you personally and issue your report! If you're curious as to why I'm here, well, I will be teaching at UA this coming year!"

Hunh. I wonder if that's due to his successor… I wonder if he found one.

"I will not take up too much of your time. You must be dying to know your results, so here they are!"

There's a screen in the back.

TOTAL SCORE: 20 Villain Points

Yeah, that's about right.

"As you can see, you scored 20 villain points. Now as you know, this is not enough to pass the practical exam."

...Yeah. I know.

"-But never fear! What heroism school would we be if we ignored the most essential traits of being a hero? Observe!"

The screen flips to a film of the practical. I see myself climb up on the zero-pointer and try to topple it over. I never figured out exactly what that quirk did. I explained it to dad. He thought I could have named it **[Seismic Toss]**. He joked that if I had super strength, it would have been funny for me to suplex a robot.

Doesn't really make any sense, but it sounds cooler than [Unbalance]. So I went with it.

I watch as Iida shoots up the side of a building and launches himself onto the treads. At the same time, the robot is laying waste to everything in front of it. I watch as one girl nearly gets buried under the rubble before the robot stops. It's reaching down for her, until it sees me and Iida on its leg. Then it takes a swipe at me, and that's where I tackle Iida off.

"Logically, there was no reason to go after the zero-pointer. Yet you did so anyway. Out of all of the groups, only a handful of applicants even tried to slow the Arena Traps down. It was madness to do so, but your bravery was not without merit!"

"You tried to bring down the zero-pointer knowing that it was not necessary to do so. For that, the teachers give you full marks for going above and beyond the call of the exam. Going Plus Ultra, you might say!"

_Um….. what?_

"For your actions, your quick thinking, and your cooperation with young Iida, we award you 30 Hero points! Since 30 and 20 make 50, I am proud to personally congratulate you on your acceptance to UA Hero Academy! Rejoice, for your wish has been granted! This is your hero academia!"

_*Bzzt*_

* * *

I take a moment. Or two. Or maybe half an hour.

I'm.. I'm in.

But am I really in? I fold my arms as Link purrs next to me. This has to be a fluke. This has to be some kind of cosmic joke, right?

I didn't know it wasn't worth anything. I wouldn't have gone after it otherwise. If that'd been the case, I would have dipped the moment I saw it, then chased down more points. I should have done that. I should have chased more points!

This… this doesn't feel like a victory. I don't know what to think. Boy, is dad in for a story tonight.

I… I need to talk to someone. Leaving the torn letter and the projection on the table, I reach for my phone. Out of all my friends, only Bakugo knows the whole truth. I didn't tell many of the others what the exam was. I didn't even tell Professor Sumac about the test. She didn't let me.

Bakugo Katsuki   
  
Hey Katsuki   
**Today** 1:05 PM   
  
What   
  
I got in   
  
FAWEFJALEJFKAWEJOFIAJE!   
  
BITCH I KNEW IT!   
  
SCREW THOSE PANSY ASS EXTRAS! WE'RE GOIN TO UA!   
  
Yeah   
  
How many fuckin' hero points did you get?   
**Today** 1:06 PM   
  
20 wasn't enough. That had to be it.   
  
They gave me 30 for rushing the zero pointer and for working with another examinee   
  
I don't feel right about that   
  
Whaddya mean?   
  
You're in! What's there to mope about?   
  
...   
  
I feel like I got in on a fluke   
  
Dude. You are a walking fluke.   
  
I don't see the problem   
  
It's like a receipt where the waiter forgot to add your fourth drink.   
  
Yeah it's not a big deal. You get a discount   
but   
  
Love it when that happens   
**Today** 1:07 PM   
  
It feels wrong. Should I tell them?   
  
Tell them waht?   
  
That you didn't mean to rush the zero pointer?   
  
Oh yeah tha'll be very convincing   
  
Doesn't this feel like lying?   
  
Nop   
  
Own that bitch   
  
Ru comin for supper tonight?   
  
...   
**Today** 1:10 PM   
  
Sure, I guess I'll own it. And yea. I tried inviting dad, but I don't think it'll stick   
  
Deku   
  
Listen up   
  
You've had so much shit on your place. Be grateful when stuff just works out.   
  
Everything doesn't have to work out right just cuz.   
  
Sometimes it just works   
  
Don't question the process   
  
Be water, bitch   
  
Rage against the shit   
  
I feel like dirty water though   
**Today** 1:11 PM   
  
Dude if you fuck this up, I will shake the living stupid out of you   
  
Just take their mistake and roll with it   
  
...   
  
I guess   
  
K, stop that dot shit   
  
I can see you shaking your head right now. Stop   
  
Get in the school   
  
Get up the steps   
  
Eat that horse   
  
Mom wants to know if you prefer pork or stake cutlets   
  
Pork   
  
Thx bakubro   
  
@ my front door in half an hour   
  
I need to wipe the bitch off your face   
**Today** 1:12 PM   
  
I'm bringing Link   
  
Oh good. He can hang with Zelda and they can watch me wiping the bitch off your face   
  
Sure, Sure   
  
What's your quirk btdubs?   
  
Qnullifier   
  
Sure it is   
  
Get over here   
  
:thumbsup:

* * *

Well. There's that.

I finish the meat pie and put the rest in the fridge with a sticky note. A quick shower before I head out. Katsuki doesn't care about the smell, but Mrs. Bakugo does. I refuse to shower in their house. I'm sorry, but the soap does weird stuff to my skin.

Grabbing a small container, I make Link's supper to take over. I'm walking to the shower when something catches my eye.

It's the family shelf. The sun is glinting off mom's talent award - the one she won in Aldera High. When she was little, she wanted to be a hero. Practiced with her quirk constantly, studied a bit too much. Realized she missed out on a social life after the fact.

Dad says she spent so much time chasing her dreams that she forgot to live until they met. He also said that I get my mind from her.

Well… Mom... it looks like I get to live up to my promise after all.


	3. Chapter 3

  
Chapter 3: Chapter 3  


**Chapter Three - Press START**

* * *

" _Hisashi Midoriya?"_

_The office door opened to reveal yet another doctor in a lab coat. He'd seen three that day with no word on his son. He'd skipped lunch when he got the call from the daycare about Izuku. They'd immediately taken him to the hospital, asked him questions, and then left him in a waiting room. For an hour._

" _Yes?" The father rose to his feet and moved to the doctor, shaking his hand._

" _I've heard you have had a tough day." the doctor said. "My name is Dr. Mosa."_

_Hisashi greeted him, but he did not smile._

" _Sir, do you have any-"_

" _Your son is resting. I can take you to him. I'm sure you have many questions; we can walk and talk." Dr. Mosa held the door open for the father._

" _How is he?" Hisashi walked beside the doctor as they made their way to the emergency ward._

" _He is resting. There was no lasting damage." Mosa saw Hisashi's shoulders drop. The man looked very tired._

" _How are his burns?"_

" _One moment."_

_Turning a corner, the two men entered a private room. Stepping in, Hisashi noticed two beds with the one closest to the window occupied. It was him. He rushed to his son's side. Dr. Mosa saw Hisashi's face light up as if he'd just seen a hero. He waited for the realization to sink in._

_It was another second before Hisashi caught on._

" _Doctor?"_

" _The burns?" Dr. Mora walked over to the other side of the bed. "Well, as you can see. No lasting damage."_

_Both men looked at the sleeping face of Izuku Midoriya. Hisashi blinked several times and put his hands on the side of the bed. Gingerly, he reached down and turned Izuku's arm over._

" _In fact. Right as he went to sleep. Well… they started to heal on their own."_

_Hisashi looked up. Dr. Mosa took a deep breath._

" _Mr. Midoriya, you recall that when he came into the hospital, you were told that there was a quirk accident. A student used their quirk too close to your son and he suffered an injury."_

_Hisashi nodded._

" _From the initial write up in the ambulance, he had suffered burns and abrasions along the right side of his face, and part of his right arm. The ride took five minutes from the moment he was picked up to the moment he was received in the emergency ward."_

_Dr. Mosa looked at Hisashi, eyes peering over the half-moon spectacles._

" _Mr. Midoriya, when we received him his burns had already begun to heal on their own. When we began to treat the worst ones on his face, it was as if the wound itself had aged weeks in minutes. Roughly an hour after sedating him, his skin had already healed into what you see right now."_

" _As if he never was burned." Hisashi murmured._

" _Sir, if I may ask, there is a pending notice from the QFA on your son's quirk. I apologize for the multiple questions you've already been asked; we were attempting to clarify your son's exact quirk, but we've been getting conflicting confirmations."_

" _If I may ask, what is your son's quirk?"_

* * *

"Leper, I am leperous, stay away!"

"Deku, what the flying fuck?"

"I am a leper, Kaachan! Stay awayyy"

Lumbering towards Katsuki, I held back laughter as my zombie-ass head stumbled in his general direction. I couldn't find a face mask. Usually we had those in stock, but apparently I'd run out sometime. To be fair, it'd been a while since I had gotten an acid quirk. Normally I'd be alright with it, but this one turned the liquids in my body to acid.

So glad I caught that before I sneezed on the TV. Hard.

Since we were out of face masks, I decided to wrap my face in medical bandages like a mummy and go around announcing to the world that I was a leper. None of the people on my street bought it, but I got some odd looks from people on the train. I got a seat to myself, too.

It's not the first time I've done this. Just the first time I've done this in awhile without Officer Cynthia's police getting called on me. So much community service.

Kaachan, he doesn't buy it; he tried to rip my costume off before I slapped his hands away.

"Nooo. I wanna go to UA like this. See what happens."

"I don't. If you're gonna be this fuckin' weird, then I'm leaving you behind. Take the next train, you mad scrub."

"But you're a hero, Kaachan! You're the only one immune to my leprosy!"

"The dead cannot harm me." Kaachan scoffs.

"Hey, I'm not a zombie. Leprosy is a skin disease. You know this."

"You will be dead if you keep this up."

"Oh come on. My net worth is gonna be better if you kill me after I become a hero."

"Deku, take it off."

"Bah." I flop down on the train and start unwrapping the bandages. "You're no fun."

"There is no fun in rebalancing a universe with you in it. The pay is fucking miserable and the hours are hell."

"...ouch." I fold the bandages into my Power Loader backpack and grin at everyone else on the train. "Don't worry ladies, he's much better in-"

"I will light your room on fire!"

I chuckle easily. The rest of the early morning train doesn't. It's so hard. Everyone is a cynic.

"Poison quirk. Acid secretions, plus general enhancement."

"General enhancement my aaaaaw—fuckin' great." Oh poo. I wanted him to make an ass joke again. Oh wait."

"Speaking of which, you remember the bargain?" I look pointedly at him.

"Yeah, yeah. I remember. You get into UA and I have to watch my mouth. Marketability and all that. Goddaaagghsnarnit I wish your dad had a different job." Kaachan is already trying. Bless him.

"Hey, if it makes you feel any better, I have to watch mine too. The peasantry cannot tolerate our high speech."

"Peasantry? And what does that make me?"

I freeze. That voice wasn't Katsuki's. I turn to face the speaker… who is standing right behind me...

_Oh fuck._

"...Good Morning, Officer Cynthia," we both say it in tandem.

"That's no way to greet a dear friend." I can literally hear the growl of the predator coming from her voice.

"... Good morning, estimable Officer of the Law who-is-also-a-goddess-but-chooses-to-appear-in-a-mortal-frame?" Kaachan pipes up with a beaming grin.

"'Frame' sounds wrong, Katsuki, but I appreciate the worship." The terror of Chandryla law enforcement is leaning on the bar next to my seat. Do not make eye contact. It cannot detect movement.

"Boy, look at me." I slowly lift my head and behold the judgment of Athena herself. Her single, grey eye unveils all of my secrets as her blonde, windswept bangs conceal the left demon eye.

"Now, I know you weren't just disturbing the peace with your teenage antics, claiming leprosy were you?"

"No ma'm." Of all the times—why is she on the 7:30 train? To Musutafu! In uniform!

"And I know that the son of Hisashi Midoriya wasn't just trying to terrorize the nice citizens of this country with a disease that has been extinct for a few millennia?"

"No, ma'am" _Please go away._

"And I just _know_ ," the demon whispers, "that two young students such as yourselves would not want any bad marks on your records on the first day of high school. UA High, to be more precise."

"No, ma'am." Katsuki is red in the face. I wish it was from constipation, but knowing him, it's from withheld laughter.

"That's my boys." She is the only one who can get away with calling Katsuki a 'boy'. I think he likes it, the masochist.

"If this humble one could put forth a question?" I raise my hand in supplication.

"This one permits it." The rest of the car has stopped trying to hold back laughter. Yeah. Chandryla. Home of old, senile walking legends who have nothing better to do with their time besides watching the young and the restless.

"What does one such as your illustrious being have to do in Musutafu?" I implore while eyeing the doors.

"Ah." Cynthia puts a finger to her pursed lips in a dramatic gesture. "Well, I suppose you can know. It's for a fundraiser gala being put on by several pro heroes. They need more bodies and I need more hours. So, yeah."

"The mortals should be honored to be graced with your radiance." Katsuki gets up and bows at the waist. "If it is permissible, we request leave to travel onward."

"This one allows it." Cynthia is beaming. I am screaming internally. Grabbing my arm, Katsuki hauls me to my feet and walks out. The demon is waving us on, mirth in her eyes.

"If we weren't trying to make a good impression, I would spit on all of your shoes, Kaachan."

"You deserved it, peasant."

Lucky in quirks. Unlucky in everything else. Lady Luck, I want a divorce.

* * *

The gates of UA loomed over us. Our entire lives in the palms of professional heroes who have fought murder, larceny, and scores of young adults like us. Oh, and All Might is here, too. The epitome of heroism. Superman, the States called him. Demetrius's Bane in Europe. The Tsar in the Russian Confederation.

No pressure. Really.

Katsuki keeps trying to unbutton his shirt and loosen his tie. I send a threatening glare his way and he stops before I use his tie as a garrote wire. Again. Public Image.

We walk up the steps and into the building. Despite it being effectively a trade school, it has enough non-heroism classes to get away with the traditional high school feel. Lockers in the foyer, a cafeteria in the main room beyond, and a throng of upperclassmen already loitering to watch the fresh meat. See, this is why I wanted to arrive early. I wanted to see the heroes-to-be.

It's pretty much what I thought. Outside of students with obvious mutant quirks, all of them scream "gods of fitness". Some of them actually have scars. If everyone wasn't already going into heroism, I'd have passed this place off as a school for nerds trapped in delinquent bodies.

Which...well...we are. Or will be. If I'm lucky.

"Which one of them do you think is in Class 3-A?"

Katsuki looks over at me. "I don't think they want your fanboying, Deku."

"Well, what do they expect? They are on TV every sports festival, so obviously we're gonna recognize some of them."

"Only you would pay attention to that." Katsuki scoffs. "And no, I didn't see any of the Big Three, Mazinger, or Stylish." He starts dragging my arm. "And yes, I smell the ozone too, but that doesn't mean you can follow to chase down Stratos."

"But I must know! Inquiring minds must know how his hair doesn't stick up like Jim Carrey crossed with an irate porcupine." I paw uselessly at Katsuki's grip as he drags me off to our class.

"Lovely image,' he said. 'Make a good first impression,' he said. 'No swearing, but sure I can act like an inept baboon if I want to. FUCK!" Katsuki cuts out a big one before he throws me into our classroom.

I stumble in and nearly catch my hip on a desk. It's mostly empty, save for a few people.

"Oh my, Deku, what did we say about swearing?" I whip my head around. Katsuki's looking at me with some kind of affronted look. He's put his hands to his mouth like he's highly offended. "I know you're a delinquent, but those days are behind us. Keep moving forward past you tragic childhood. Plus ul-"

"I'mma stop you right there before you slander the rest of my good name. That was you! That was you swearing!"

"I would **never**." He draws out 'never' as if he's savoring the taste. I'll give him the finger in the lockers.

"Midoriya!"

Oh joy. Lungs. I turn and see Iida barreling at me. I come up to his chest, so it's a bit difficult to squint up.

"I am deeply disappointed at your actions during the exam! Your slander of your position and your quirk usage-"

"-was a joke. Dude. Chill." I cut him off. He'd probably go on for hours.

"Why I ought to-"

"Apologize?" I smile. "Well, too bad. Me first."

That shuts him up. I put my arms at my side and bow towards him.

"Iida Tenya, I humbly apologize for my actions before the practical exam. It was not my intent to distract everyone in the briefing and I repent for what I did."

"Oh... " He's taken off guard. "Well… I should… I should also apologize!" He nearly clips my head with his vertical bow. "I should not have called you and your compatriot out in front of everyone!"

I see Katsuki mouth " _compatriot_ " at me in the back row. He's already taken a seat.

"Apology accepted. May we start over as estimable colleagues?" I extend my hand. No, I'm not used to speaking like this, but fuck it. He's a classmate and a possible contact for after UA. I'm not passing that up.

"Certainly!" Iida straightens up. I make some more small talk. He's the third in line for the Ingenium title. He doesn't like the fact that he came from Somei, even though I've heard it has a nasty piece of work for a physics program that some people would kill to attend. His quirk is Engine. Same as his brother's.

More people trickle in. There's a person with a crow for a head, a person with two-tone hair, and a person with six arms. Oof. His wardrobe. I feel his pain. I sit next to Katsuki as the rest of the classmates come in. One of them is pink with horns. One of them is red with horns.

Around the time the last person comes in (are those vines in their hair?), a yellow caterpillar walks through the door. Not the strangest thing I've seen—until it walk behind the podium.

It's got a human face. Dear me, is this the result of unchecked genetic experiments? Is he another Nezu?

"Welcome to UA." Man, that's one heck of a dead tone. "I am assuming all of you here are supposed to be in 1-A. If you're not, get out."

No one moves.

"I'm not going to bother with the roll. We can get that later. For now—" he pulls out a tracksuit from within his carapace. "—put this on. Meet me outside in ten minutes. If you're late, I'm expelling you."

…I like this caterpillar.

* * *

"It took you nine minutes and forty-eight seconds. In the future, if someone says they know where the locker room is, follow them and do not argue. It wastes your time, it wastes my time, and time is important."

We're all outside in what looks like UA's track and field. I'm at the back of the group, trying to figure out what to do when I start sweating. I have no idea if my acid quirk is related to sweat. I had **[Acid Armor]** once, which also affected my sweat. It ate at anything I had on.

You heard that right. Anything. Oh, the shame. _Oh the blackmail._

"I know it is very sudden, but you will have to get used to things like this. Tardiness has no place here. As of this moment, consider yourselves heroes in training."

There was a zipping sound. An unkempt hobo emerged from the inside of the caterpillar and turned to face us. I notice the bloodshot eyes and the scarf around his neck. Coupled with the black suit overall, he seems familiar. Bad time to leave my Jpad back in the class.

"My name is Shouta Aizawa, and I will be your homeroom teacher for the future. If you have any questions about anything in UA, do not hesitate to ask. Hesitation wastes time. There are no stupid questions. If you happen to ask a stupid question, I'll let you know. It would be irrational not to tell you."

Solid. Aizawa rings a bell. He has the attention of everyone.

"Now, to business." Aizawa pulls out a phone. "The reason you are outside is simple. Before you can move forward in your hero studies, I need a baseline. Today, we are going to administer a quirk-assessment test." Suddenly, he points at someone in the crowd.

"Bakugou Katsuki. 70 villain points and 15 hero points. Full marks on the writing portion and first place overall in the practical exam. Step forward." I watch him move.

"Do you recall the phys-ed tests you all have taken before? You're doing them again. Only this time," Aizawa pulls out a ball from his yellow sleeping bag. "-I want you to use your quirks. All of them."

_All of them? Meaning more than one?_ I look over at two-tone-hair. _Cause if that's who I think it is, then… hunh._

I watch Katsuki walk up to the ball. It looks reinforced. Aizawa tells him to throw it. Bakugo steps up to the circle and winds his arm back.

" **BEGONE!"** An ear-splitting explosion rips through the air. A few people jump in surprise. I'm almost impressed he didn't break something that time. Just for a laugh one day, he decided to do that with a frisbee (read: tire hubcap) we found while training. Instead of hurling it into the sea, he broke it on contact. The shrapnel flew everywhere.

That's actually how he got the scar above his right eye. Makes him look badass when he slicks his hair back. You wouldn't normally see it otherwise. I keep saying that we got into a delinquent knife fight and I won, but I'm getting off track again.

"Fun? You think this is going to be a fun test?" I need to stop spacing out, because Aizawa is giving us the death glare. Did I say something?

"Hmm. Alright." He grins devilishly. "We can make this fun. Whoever comes last overall in all of the events will be deemed having no potential and will be _personally expelled_."

"What?!"

"That's not fair!"

"Totally unmanly, dude!"

"This is not in good faith—"

"I'm sorry, did I stutter?" Aizawa cuts the protests off. "Do you have eyes? Do you watch the news? Just today, a typhoon leveled an entire city in Indonesia. 145 people dead, countless missing. Four villains blew up an interstate and dropped a high school track team's bus into a convenience store. Twelve dead, including the city president.

"Natural disasters, villains, grudge matches, quirk-assisted domestic abuse, wage gaps—there are countless unfair situations in the world. There are millions of people who see the world differently than you do. To them, the world is not what they want it to be, and they will go to lethal extremes to change it. How easy it must seem on TV for heroes to stop wannabe robbers. What about the villains that heroes fight in the dark? What about the trafficking rings?

"Life is not fair. If you still think it is, talk to the victims of the L-Train accident whose lives were ruined when a bomb went off in the engine car. This world is unforgiving. It is illogical to think otherwise. If you do not have potential as a hero, then better that I escort you out _today_ , rather than you getting killed—or getting someone else killed while having fun.

"If you want to be a hero, then show me you can take it. Show me you can take the unfairness. That is **plus ultra**. Now line up. We're wasting time." He turns away and the rest of the class follows. The pink girl looks like she's near tears.

* * *

The exercises are more mundane than I thought. 100 meter dash, side-step, etc. We go in pairs, with the rest of us warming up. Aizawa is calling Katsuki up to the dash when I see him kick his shoes off.

Oh. He's doing that. Hunh. I think Aizawa got to him.

"Ready? … Start!"

_Kracka-boom!_ Katsuki rockets off the starting blocks. The metal is ruined, on account of him blowing up the blocks themselves with the sweat on his feet. His arms are thrown back as he's almost flying through the air. Every time his foot hits the ground, a small explosion rockets him forward.

3.89 seconds. He skids to a halt and nearly falls over. His hands and feet are smoking. I pick up his shoes and walk over.

"A little excessive there, Katsuki?" I watch as the pink girl he was with shakily runs back to the group. I think he startled her with how fast and loud he came off the blocks.

"Fuck no." He whispers that. "It's plus ultra."

"That's a metaphor."

"Yeah, and I killed it. Your turn." I sigh. Somethings never change.

"Midoriya Izuku." A few robots have come onto the field and replaced the blocks. I'm next to a tall dude with six arms and built like a tank. I give him a thumbs-up as I plant my feet into the blocks.

"Ready—" I tense my muscles. I can almost hear my joints creaking as I crouch a lot lower than the other guy. I feel the general enhancement side of my quirk act up as my muscles tense up.

"Start!" I rocket off the blocks as the energy in my legs drives me forward. I outstrip six-arms and hit the finish a full second faster than he does.

4.48 seconds. It's faster than Pinky, but I think she could have gone a bit faster too. I fumble to a halt and flop down. My muscles feel like jelly. I just need to give it a moment. It happens.

I discreetly check under my shirt. It's only been a few events and I'm sweating. Luckily, it doesn't seem to be interacting with my clothes, so it's not **[Acid Armor]**. That would be embarrassing to explain away. I can't recall the exact acid-type quirk I have, but I know what it feels like.

Sit-ups. I can feel my core muscles crunch as I sit up with ease. It's tricky, these general enhancements. I have to be careful with the muscle-focused ones. I can move much more easily than normal, but since I'm not normally enhancing my body systems, I need to make sure I don't break anything on accident.

Not that it's stopped me. I did that once with **[Hammer Arm]**. Broke my fist and the whole arm when I tried it out on a stone brick in a quirk gymnasium. I passed out almost immediately from the shock—what six year old wouldn't? I strengthened my arm, but that didn't extend to the rest of the body that I threw behind the hand. Whoops.

Grip Test. I watch in fascination as my muscles creak and undulate under my skin. It's a bit like a snake, if I was to be honest.

Now it's my turn for the ball throw. Honestly, I'm not sure how this one is going to turn out.

"Aizawa-sensei, can I kick the ball?"

"No. It is a ball throw. Use your arm."

Oh well. I bring it behind me and wind up. I wait for when it feels like I hit my limit in my arm muscle, then I heave my whole body forward. I chuck that thing like it's a cold turkey being fired out of a cannon and watch it soar.

I look at the score. 85 meters. Not bad. It's decent, and a bit farther than if I'd thrown it normally. Thank you Lady Luck. I turn to walk back.

"Hold on one moment." I look at Aizawa. He's glaring at me like I stepped in his birthday cake.

"Sensei?"

"What is your quirk?" Oh…

"Acid-type. General enhancement. It's what I woke up with."

"Really?" Aizawa peers at his phone. "Midoriya Izuku. 50 points. 20 villain and 30 rescue points."

He looks at me and I can sense something coming.

"You were slated to be put in Class 1-B." I… don't know how to take that. I can feel everyone's eyes on me. I'm confused.

"Sir?"

"Midoriya, please explain your quirk to the class."

"...In front of the whole class, sir?"

"Yes in front of the whole class."

"...May I ask why?"

"Do you not want to explain it?" Aizawa walks closer. If he's trying to scare me, it's kinda working. "Because when I looked at your file, I couldn't explain it either. In the field, you will need to work with other heroes. If I can't figure out what you can do and if they can't figure out your quirk, you will be a liability. Poor communication kills."

Well, I can get behind that.

"Well…" I look at the class. "Short answer is that I don't know. For lack of a better term, I call it ' **Lady Luck** '." Katsuki snorts at the name. Hey, he picked it. "Basically, I wake up with a different quirk every day."

"Elaborate." Aizawa sensei has his eyebrows pulled together.

"Um…" I look around. "So, say I go to sleep. I wake up, and I can have Iida's quirk except without the pipes sticking out of his legs. I go to sleep, and I can have Katsuki's quirk. I take a small nap, and I can have something like Mount Lady's quirk."

"Really?"

"Yes, sir."

Aizawa gives me another look. I swear, this man can communicate with his eyes and eyebrows alone. "You get a different quirk every time you regain consciousness."

"Yes, sir."

"That's completely illogical." He shakes his head. "Do you know what quirk you wake up with?"

"Not at first. I have to test it every day."

"How long does that take?" Aizawa raises one eyebrow with this question.

"Roughly a minute if I hurry. Usually three if I'm being thorough."

"And you have no control over what quirk you're going to wake up with," Aizawa deadpans.

"I have cataloged over 680 quirks in my life." I hear a few sharp gasps with that. Both of Aizawa's eyebrows raise at that.

Aizawa takes a moment. "Why did you said 'Acid-based, general enhancement'?"

I purse my lips. "Because I can spit and sneeze an acidic substance right now. I can also contract my muscles like a...um… I'm just stronger right now overall."

Ohh, I remember now. It is snake-like. Professor Sumac compared my muscles to a coiling snake when I asked her the day I got it, and I named it **[Coil]**.

"So, if you were to lose consciousness right now and someone woke you up, you would have no idea what quirk you would wake up with."

"If I get knocked out in the field, then I figure it'll be too late to figure it out. On the other hand, if I fall asleep in a hostage situation, I can repeatedly nap until I find a quirk that'll break me out."

"...Hunh." Aizawa doesn't say anything after that. He just stares at me. I stare at him. He stares at me some more. I'm confused. Do I look away? Do I go back to the group?

"I'm going to try something. Do you have my permission?"

Now, when someone you barely know interrogates you about your life's story and then says 'I'm going to try something', the best course of action would be to kick him in the groin and run the opposite direction screaming bloody murder. This is because the last time that happened, someone took a wooden bat and cracked me in the groin to test my **[Iron Defense]**.

I about killed Katsuki that day. I was suspended for a week.

"...You have my permission?" I take a small step back and ready my foot.

Suddenly, I see Aizawa's eyes light up red as his hair starts to defy gravity. There's an awful taste in my mouth and I suddenly go weak in the knees. The top of my mouth burns like I just ate a raw pepper.

"Uhhhgg.." I spit. Is that blood? Is my mouth bleeding? The ground is rushing up to me at the same time as I feel a burning sensation in my nose. I pitch forward and expect to hit dirt, when a cool fabric wraps around arms. Aizawa's hands are on my shoulders and his eyes are no longer red.

" _Furgleflurglergurlge"_. What?

" _..-dor-i….akay?_ "

"Huzznnwhut?" Everything is blurry and I feel sick.

"Kid, look at me. Are you okay?" I stare blankly at him. I barely recognize a set of yellow goggles around his neck. Oh, wait I know him. I try to say something, but there's still a coppery taste in my mouth and my ears are ringing.

"Uhnfm...mmm...noooo?"

I black out.

* * *

_Deku's taking too long. He threw the fucking ball, so why is he talking with Mr. Hobo? He asks him to explain his quirk, and I know Deku's in for a bad time. He doesn't like explaining his quirk, but he's being too polite._

" _That makes sense." I can hear Glasses whisper when Deku talks about his 'Lady'. "That explains the practical. I thought it was a cognitive balance emitter." I'm not sure what he's talking about, but I can see Deku is getting nervous. He's starting to fidget with his hands and tap his foot. He doesn't even realize he's doing it. That's how bad it is. He gets like this whenever someone asks him about his quirk, his several pro-hero crushes, why he sings in the shower, or his parents._

_I see Mr. Hobo ask him something. Deku takes a step back. Oh, for the love of—what the hell is going on? Did Mr. Hobo not read the literal pamphlet attached to his file or did homeroom teachers not get that? Fucking-A._

_Then Deku spits blood. I'm shoving people past me as I see him start to lean over and the black creep wrap him with his scarf. There's blood coming out of his mouth as he's scrabbling with his hands, grasping air. I'm already on the black hobo when Deku's legs give out and the hobo catches him._

" _What the fuck! What did you do to Deku!" I will wipe his face clean off—damn the consequences!_

" _Katsuki. Calm down." He's staring at me, and I feel the fire suddenly go out. I'm staring into red eyes that I just want to gouge out with my fingers, but he's holding Deku._

_Deku is limp in his arms._

_Deku's eyes are unfocused and there's blood on his cheek._

" _My quirk is Erasure. It lets me erase quirks. Calm dow—"_

" _And you thought you could fucking reset him like that? That's not how it works!" There's a memory of a doctor touching Deku as he's using_ _ **[Psychic]**_ _and he collapses, blood coming out his nose. "You can't erase his quirk like that—his body hasn't reset!"_

" _Katuski-"_

" _Did you fucking read his file? What shitty-" There's arms around me. Several. I kick backwards._

" _KATSUKI! What do you mean reset!" Aizawa is shouting at me._

" _Why the bloody shit do you think? He has to sleep! His body has to_ _ **[Rest]**_ _! It's how it adapts! You can't reset his quirk on comman- HEY GET BACK HERE! I'm not done yet!" He's not listening. Mr. Hobo is already rushing away, carrying Deku towards robots._

_He hurt Deku in the worst way. I don't care that he looks like he didn't know. The last time Deku had his quirk erased, he fell in a coma._

_It's the first day of class and motherfucking Deku is in a coma._

_How's he going to fucking fulfills his mom's dream if he's dead!_

* * *


End file.
